LOST Thoughts – S5 E9

Here are my thoughts on the ninth episode of Lost (season five), “Namaste”:

1. How is it that virtually overnight, “LaFleur” morphs from a caring and benevolent flower-picker to a faux-intellectual egomaniac who compares himself to Winston Churchill???  Boy, Jack really brings out the worst in Sawyer!
2. That was sort of a weird interaction between Jack and Juliet when she opened the door to the love shack.  It was kind of like running into someone from college you hooked up with at a party that one time…awk-ward.
3. I think that Phil, the unibrowed Dharma manifest checker/staff photographer, is on to Jack, Kate and Hurley.  They won’t be having a hootenanny on HIS watch!
4. And is it just me, or was Juliet kind of messing with Kate’s head a little bit and intentionally bringing Phil the “corrected” sub manifest at the last possible nanosecond before Kate ended up sharing cells and sandwiches with Sayid?  That look Juliet gave Kate was like, “Back off…Sawyer’s MINE now, bitch!”
5. Speaking of Sayid, let me see if I can get this straight.  When a supposed hostile breaches security at The Flame station (years before it would become “Patchy Manor”), Radzinsky’s main concern isn’t the safety of his people – it’s that Sayid saw his cute little popsicle stick model?!?  Is he afraid Sayid’s going to steal it for the 7th Grade Science Fair???
6. By the way, would it have killed Jin to at least wink at Sayid when he threw him to the ground and pointed the gun at his head?  I mean, anything to let him know that he’s not really a Dharma, he just plays one on TV.
7. As for Mrs. Jin, it’s no wonder Korea is doing so well at the World Baseball Classic…even their women can hit for power!  If Ben’s head hadn’t been attached to his body, Sun would have knocked it into the gap for a stand-up double.
8. It turns out Amy isn’t just a mild-mannered Dharma housewife, after all.  She’s also a submarine captain and the mother of…ETHAN ROM!!!  I didn’t see THAT one coming, but it does make sense, other than trying to figure out why Ethan’s last name isn’t Goodspeed.  Maybe Rom is Amy’s maiden name?  If only Amy and Horace had realized their son’s name is an anagram for “arm he not,” they could have kept him away from guns and he wouldn’t have grown up to be such a creepy pregnant-lady-kidnapping-and-injecting psychopath.  Chalk this one up to poor parenting.
9. The only thing creepier than adult Ethan is young Ben.  Are you SURE you really want to eat that sandwich, incarcerated Sayid???  It might be a peanut butter and anthrax!  At least it’s not a hot dog, because Ben Linus happens to be an anagram for “bun in els,” and eating ANYTHING that had been removed from South Africa’s biggest golfer is a dicey proposition at best.  Besides, the one thing jail cells and sandwiches DO have in common is that both are known for “five dollar footlongs.”
10. Has there ever been a more ethnically confused name than Pierre Chang?  I mean, even if you tried, the closest you could come up with would be something like Pedro Glickstein or Dieter Olajuwon.