LOST Thoughts – S5 E3

Here are my thoughts on the third episode of Lost (season five), “Jughead”:

1. After spending so many years stranded on a remote island, wouldn’t a boat be the LAST place Desmond would want to live?!?
2. Will there ever be a precise enough shift in time on the island for Locke and the gang to stumble upon Alpert during his extremely brief three-month “Batmanuel” phase?
3. The mullet on Oxford-era Faraday rivals Miley’s daddy at his achy-breakiest.
4. When Juliet’s Latin chat with The Others jarringly turned into a sudden escape attempt, Sawyer’s plea for Locke to shoot the fleeing soldier should have been, “Ixnay on the ompassioncay, Mr. Clean.”
5. Oh, that soldier was…YOUNG WIDMORE!  That means he and Ben were both on Team Alpert at one point, so how did they become mortal enemies?  My money is on a pre-teen Ben recklessly getting his peanut butter in Widmore’s chocolate.
6. For the love of Jacob, can somebody please get Charlotte a Kleenex?!?
7. Going back to Alpert for just a moment…is it too rudimentarily ironic to point out his striking resemblance to Rod Serling?
8. Now that we’ve learned that the camp of The Others is immediately adjacent to a bomb named “Jughead,” I fully expect future episodes to reveal a couple of Alpert’s non-Widmore footsoldiers are named Moose and Reggie.
9. Back to the globe-yachting Hume family for a moment…if you’re wife is in her fourth trimester, wouldn’t you make a point of docking where you can run into a hospital to grab an obstetrician, rather than a mixed-use poker/cockfighting tent?
10. I said it before and I’ll say it again – despite the growing protestations of Faraday – Miles needs more lines!!!